The Realest Post I Ever Wrote-Happy 2012

This post is brought to you by this beautiful view of the Pacific Ocean that I am currently admiring from my hotel room window. :-) I havent been the best blogger in the year 2011 (with very good excuses might I add), but in 2012 I will definitely try my hardest to at least blog once a week. Keyword...TRY!!!!!! Moving on though, my aunt keeps telling me that this is my year when it comes to academics, professional, etc. While I do believe her, I just wanted to step back, think, and express myself a little. 2011 has been a crazy year. Definitely one of my hardest working years and I have to say that I am extremely proud of myself. Although I've had a great year as far as determination and ambition, I haven't been the best person that I could be. Like you all, I am a work in progress. I'm not perfect. No one is. This may be a bold thing to say, but I'm starting to think that people would like to focus on all your negatives then focus on your positives. And that's sad. In a world of imperfections, I do not think that people have a right to judge you based on the things that you do, when they should look in the mirror themselves.

I'm starting to realize that not everyone is for you. Although they say that they will always be in your corner, love you, etc., with some, thats far from the truth. That they would rather see you suffer in a time of need, then put differences aside to help you. I have to say that THAT's the most selfish thing you can do. Things happen, whether it was provoked, accidentally, etc. And ppl make mistakes. But why must they be constantly reminded by the wrong that they have done and be treated so cold? I've done some effed up things in 2011. Really just 1 thing...but I don't deserve to be treated inhumanely no matter what. Well, there are some acceptable actions that can result to one being treated like sh*t, but I digress.... Point is, everyone who truly knows me would agree.


Spending my 1st of the New Year physically sick and emotionally drained was a turning point for me. No one likes to be sick on vacay. That's the worst thing ever. And one wants to feel alone. I was able to sit back and reflect on ALL 365 days of 2011. Every positive and every negative. At the end of the day, all I can say that 2011 was the year of strength ( testing of strength). They were and still are alot of lessons to be learned even past 2011, but I have definetely learned alot. Being able to get away and be miles away from home really can clear your head, and although my head isn't completely clear ( because I'm still congested lol), I had my time to think and reflect on life. I want go leave 2011 behind and focus on what's ahead.

To my close friends, I thank you for all that you do and continue to do for me. Whether we speak everyday or every few weeks, I thank you for always being there in some shape or form. To my family, no words needed. My actions speak so much louder then what words can describe. To those individuals that I have hurt of offended along the way in 2011, I do apologize for crossing lines and for my short comings.

I look forward to all that 2012 has to offer. The new people that enter my life, the strengthen of friendships and relationships, the new adventures, and just enjoying life period. Those who chose not to accompany me on my journey, that's your decision and I wish you nothing but the best in all that you do. I believe that everything happens for a reason. What that reason is, I have no idea. But I do know that everything in life is a lesson.

I know that I am going places in life. I may stumble on the way, but at the end of the day, God has my back and is looking out for me. I hold no negative feelings towards ANYONE as I embark in this new year and new journey. All I can do is look forward. I said all that I could say and had to say. If people still want to be consumed in what I have done or havent done, then......?????

A special birthday shout out to two amazing women....my friend Leslie and Arika!!!!!!! I hope you guys enjoy your big days and ask that God continues to bless you both!!!!! Xoxoxox

Another SHOUTOUT to my bestie who got engaged on NYE and I was there to witness it. Love is a beautiful thing and to be apart of something as precious as an engagement brought tears to my eyes. I'm sooo proud of you and I see great things happening for the both of you. Congrats!!!

To the person trying to sell or break the code to get into my lost phone....good luck!!! Mad I lost all 300 and something of my pictures but there's no point in crying over spilled milk. New phone is on it's waaaayyyyy :-)

To my future....I'm ready for ya *Drake voice* :-)

Last day of vacay...going out with a bang.....

HAPPY 2012!!!!!!!

-Mel

'Tis The Season To Be Thankful

I know, I know...I've been REALLY bad at keeping up with my blogging, but those who know me best can understand exactly why. It's almost been 2 months since I last posted something. I know...a SHAME! lol. Just be patient with me guys. :-)

Anywho, Thanksgiving is one of my favorite holidays (besides Christmas and my birthday :-)). Primarily because I'm just greedy and I LOOVVEEE food. But besides the food, I love when I can get together with my family, share laughs, create new memories, and watch football!!! With Thanksgiving being 4 days away, I just wanted to share some of the things that I am thankful for. So here goes:

1. I'm thankful for a God that NEVER quits. 

2. I'm thankful for oxygen flowing through my lungs, food in my stomach, a roof over my head, clothes on my back, a warm house, and my comfy bed :-)

3. Although my job annoys me at times, I'm thankful that I have one and the doors that it has open for me thus far. 

4. I'm thankful for a great support system that consists of my family and friends. <3

5. I'm thankful for my 5 senses. They all might not work to full capacity, but I'm still thankful for them! A lot of people take there's for granted.

6. I'm thankful for understanding friends. I know that I may not talk to some of you ALL the time and months will go by without us speaking verbally, but when we finally do talk or get together, we never miss a beat! So I'm extremely grateful for my REAL friends out there who are understanding of life,  appreciate my efforts of keeping the love alive from a distance whether it's a text, tweet, fb message, Skype, pigeons, 20 sec phone calls, four page letters, etc (*smiles* lol) and do not get offended when we don't speak. Mel loves you all long time!!! lol

7. I'm thankful for growth...evolution...change! 

8. I'm thankful for good music! Can't say I would still be sane without it! lol

9. I'm thankful for having the means to travel. This year alone I was able to travel a lot. The year isn't over yet! ;-)

10. I'm thankful for my Lovie!!!! <3

11. I'm thankful for this semester almost being over!!! Love the class, but I need a BREAK!! lol

12. I'm thankful for my readers. Those who take the time out of their day to stop by and read. And if you don't read, that's okay. I'm just thankful that you stopped by ;-)

13. I'm thankful for new friendships. This one goes out to you soulmate! :-) <3

13. I'm thankful for an open mind. 

14. I'm thankful for the Discovery Fit and Health and Investigation Discovery Channels. They maintain my sanity as well. Lol

15. I'm thankful for how I was raised growing up. I admire my drive, determination, optimism, my goals, etc. I know that I am going places in life. And I won't stop until I get there. :-)

So there you have it. Just some of the things I am thankful for. I could break it down even more, but that's not necessary. Lol. I'm honestly thankful for EVERYTHING. Life itself. If you haven't already, take the time and reflect about the people, places, or things that you are grateful for. What are you thankful for?

Be safe and have a HAPPY TURKEY DAY GUYS!!!! Gobble Gobble!!!

Politics...As Usual

I don't even know where to begin. I heard the CRAZIEST thing as I came home from work today. First and foremost, let me just put out there that I'm not really into politics, but I have started to follow it more since I've relocated. I think as young and growing adults, we need to be VERY aware of the topics/issues that could possibly affect you in a positive or negative way. Now, with THAT said, what I'm about to write has NOTHING to do with the well-being of us at ALL. So, you guys know of a man named Donald Trump right? It appears that now he is questioning President Barack Obama's academics and intellect/intelligence, saying such things as "I heard he was a bad student, how did he get into Columbia and Harvard" and "I have friends who have kids that are smart and can't even get into Harvard" (or something along those lines when it comes both quotes). My immediate reaction....PISSED! It's so sad and unfortunate that till THIS DAY, people cannot accept that we have a African-American president, and will do ANYTHING to discredit him as a human being. Contrary to Mr. Trump's belief, Pres Obama was a very good student. He admits that he wasn't always that way, but I think it's normal for students to have that one semester or two that they don't do so great. And for Mr. Trump's INFORMATION...Pres Obama was the President of Harvard University's Law Review. Sooo, Mr. Donald Trump, are you trying to suggest that since Pres. Obama is a BLACK MAN that THAT puts him at a disadvantage when it comes to intelligence? That he's no smarter than a Caucasian male with them SAME exact transcripts, extracurricular activities, experiences etc.? I would really like to know the answer to those questions. But since you failed HORRIBLY at trying to discredit my Pres 3 YEARS into his presidency, I suggest you do something for me---SIT YOUR ASS DOWN and SHUT THE {*censored*} up!

And PLEASE PLEASE PLLLEEAAAASSSEEEE do NOT get me started on the woman that tried to challenge Obama on his U.S. citizenship. Yes, she straight came out and called Pres Obama a LIAR because he was not BORN in this country even AFTER she was presented with the actually document of his birth certificate. (Leaving out her name on purpose, because honestly, her name is NOT welcomed here. Check out CNN or MSNBC for more information.) I seriously CAN'T with people anymore. The one thing I admire about Pres. Obama the most (out of many things that is) is that through this all he is not phased by any of the slander. In his exact words, he considers it "silliness", and rightfully so. He has better things to do and take care then to worry about what individuals have to say about him.

I could go on and on about the naysayers, but I'm just going to end with a few words--GET OVER IT! We have an African-American president, which in my opinion is doing a HELL of a job trying to fix a country that was in shambles even before he was elected. In life, you have to realize that you can't make everyone happy. With a job like that, besides making the best decisions for the American people, who have to also make the best decisions for the country. Everybody doesn't have to agree with him or even like him, but one thing you will do, is RESPECT him!

*drops mic*

We're Really Growing Up--Life!

First and foremost let me say, HAPPY APRIL and HAPPY APRIL FOOLS TO ALL you jokers out there. I haven't gotten pranked today, and I hope I don't! Lol. I think I'm going to do some research behind this holiday, because I'm not sure why it is one. But I digress...

Moving on...

I had to take this moment to have a real life convo with my readers. This life is soo crazy yet so beautiful at the same time. The older and older I become, the wiser I get, and I am very appreciative of my mindset and mentality and would not change a SINGLE thing about the person that I am. Now, with that said, as I have stated before, I am a very observant person, and to top it off, I'm a thinker.What I have been observing and thinking about the most is those who surround me that are in the same age bracket as me that are sharing their lives with the people they love. Don't get me yet...I'm talking about ENGAGEMENTS, MARRIAGES, and PREGNANCIES! I can't tell you how many people that I know that are either recently engaged, wedding just around the corner, or with little buns in the oven, and I'm blown away by it all. (But in a good way though :-)) I'm realizing each and every day that ish is getting REAL in these streets. It's great to see the people that are closest to me, people that I grew up with, went to school with, and even family members that are embarking on one, if not ALL of the three. I have to say, I'm hating a wee bit right now, but IT'S all love, because I'm happy for each and everyone of you guys and I truly mean that!

I can't say it enough how life is crazy, unpredictable, but yet a beautiful gift that we often take for granted. What makes this life worth living even more is being able to share it with the people you love the most--family members, friends, and life partners. I don't care what ANY ONE says. EVERYONE WANTS/NEEDS SOMEONE! So all you bruised, hopeless romantics out there, you're time will come when you experience love, marriage, and children. You may have been telling yourself that you've waited long enough and your patience is running low, but just continue to be just that--patient. God is in the works of creating your ideal man/woman., and those that you have lost along the way, were all a waste of time. Okay, that sounds harsh but not necessarily a "waste of time". Just a lesson you needed to learn. (Yes, that sounds MUCH better, although, some people that may have came in and out of your life were really a waste of time *shrugs* lol.) Me personally, I'm a fan of love! A sucker for it as some will say about me. But I can't help it. I have a BIG CARING HEART to give and share with the right individual. ;-) I just LOVE to see people so happy with all the things that they've dreamed, hoped for, prayed about, etc. To see it actually happening around me instead of in movies, just goes to show that dreams do come true. Hello, movies about love wouldn't be made if real life experiences never occurred--at least that's how I SEE IT! lol. But don't get me wrong....I've become more of a realist then ANY THING else as the days go by and the more and more growing I do.

Well, to wrap this all up, congrats to you ALL for the life changing events that are happening to you. Congrats to my mothers and fathers-to-be, wives and husbands-to be, the newlyweds, new parents, and to the buns in the ovens that are cooking! A BIG SHOUT OUT to the MEN (notice I said MEN, not BOYS) that know where they want to go in life, and are secure with themselves as men to take on a bold action as proposing to your girlfriend, and/or being the best father-to-be. There needs to be more GREAT MEN out there, so all my hopeless romantics can share the same happiness ;-) And for those who haven't reached that point yet, SHOUT OUT to the couples that have been together for YEARS. Shout out to those individuals who met their significant other in college, who have been with their partner since high school. Those who parted ways  just to end up back together and brought you guys even stronger!! Shout out to those who are taking a risk with love!Shout out the those not letting the confusion of life cloud your judgement and keeping you away from the woman/man that you love. Shout out to those individuals that just got into a relationship. Enjoy the journey! SHOUT OUTS TO YOU ALL!!!!

To love...peace...happiness...

To LIFE! *raises glass and insert sappy love song here*

Love Vs. Lust

I'd have to say that this has been a topic that has been on my mind lately. I am an analytical person and will break things down to a TEE trying to understand it as a whole. And although I feel like I know the difference between LOVE and LUST, a lot of individuals my age do not and/or allow LUST to get in the way of LOVE.

It's as simple as this for me...LUST: yearning, desiring, and wanting to be with a person sexually without any emotional attachment. In simple terms--it's JUST sex! Now, is it normal for any man or women of all ages to lust after certain individuals they may know, fantasy about, or randoms...umm...I guess so. Well, I take that back..I KNOW so. Is it normal you ask? Yes...it is. There's nothing wrong with lusting, but here is where the bomb is DROPPED. People tend to confuse LUST and LOVE, and honestly, I think by a certain age, you should be able to distinguish the two.

LOVE to me...well..I'm not sure I can fully explain what love is. Because it's more of a feeling and even an action. When you LOVE your partner, it's like a breath of fresh air. Love feels like freedom. Love makes you feel INVINCIBLE. A natural high! You can feel it, smell it, taste it, hear it, and when it's real and genuine...you can definitely SEE IT.  A place where you and your lover can escape to. Love is overwhelming in a good way. Just talking about love will make you cry...THAT'S WHAT LOVE IS! Everybody's definition of love is different than mine, and that's okay. I always believed then when you truly love someone, all you see is them, until a wise woman--my mother--told me that it was normal for guys of all ages to have fantasies about being with other women, and the same thing goes for women. I was shocked to hear such a thing, but mothers know best because they have been there...DONE IT ALL! Lol

The thing that I don't seem to understand, is why do men (and women in some cases) allow LUST to get in the way of LOVE? Why do men allow the LUST for other women get in the way of how they feel about you? Why do they allow LUST to CONFUSE the LOVE that they feel and have for you? You LUST and now questioning whether you LOVE me or not? (not me persay...a general statement..so lets clear that up QUICKLY lol.) Why does LUST have to change EVERYTHING, when all it is is just that...LUST??? Soo many unanswered questions, and I will probably never figure out the true answer to it. But for me personally, I find it quite unfortunate that men allow lust to get in the way of how they truly feel about the person they have invested YEARS in. I can understand that men and women do like to explore life. In this case...sleep around and experience different people. I'm not saying it's right or wrong, because it's simply whatever you chose to do. I will never judge a person for sleeping around or only having one sexual partner. But...what I WILL JUDGE is you leaving your 80 for a 20! (Ever heard of the 80/20 rule? If not...LOOK IT UP, or watch "Why Did I Get Married" :-) )

I think it's soo CRUSHING when a guy leaves the woman he loves all because of lust, and sits there and has the audacity to question whether he really loved you in the first place because of LUST. And although it's normal, it's better to get that stuff out your system before you attempt to be in a committed relationship. But don't be so ASS BACKWARDS about it! Don't invest so much TIME, ENERGY, BLOOD ,SWEAT, TEARS, TOLERANCE, PATIENCE, etc. nurturing a relationship which progress is seen, to THEN decide that you want to test the waters.

Now, although I took it THERE with you guys, there is happier side of love and lust.

Lust and love CAN be as a whole. Because when you really love someone, you also lust for them. You can lust to be with your man/woman. You can yearn for their touch, their kiss, their hugs, etc. And in that particular situation, love and lust is a beautiful thing. I think it's a great feeling to be so connected to your partner not only sexually, but physically, mentally, spiritually, and emotionally. That's what I call LOVE!

I'm going to leave this topic open for discussion. I've gave you my opinions, so PLEASE feel free to leave a comment below. Men...you are MORE then welcome to comment also. I encourage your comments!

What's Going On?

Man, where do I even begin? I was really suppose to post this yesterday but I got a little tangled up. I'm a day late but my thoughts about this situation doesn't change. I'm sure you've heard about the DEVASTATING events that have taken place on Friday in Japan. (And if you haven't, have you been hiding under a rock for a day? Like..REALLY. Be up on your current events!) Anywho, first and foremost, I want to send out my condolences to anyone who is affected by the earthquake and tsunami in Japan, Hawaii, and the West Coast. Apart from this situation, I know you guys are ALSO familiar with what's going on in Libya (once again, if you DON'T know, please do some research!)  My heart is really heavy about all of these natural disasters and wars, because I honestly feel like God is trying to speak to us. Well, more like SCREAMING because he's been speaking to us for QUITE some time now. Now, I'm not trying to preach, or even get all religious on here, but seriously, what is going on in our world? When I think about all these earthquakes that have happened within the past year, the flooding and tornadoes that are hitting the states, and the violence going on overseas, it REALLY makes me sad and wonder if our days are numbered here on Earth.

What makes me even more sad that it takes something bad happening for us all to get a reality check. It's takes natural disasters, close calls, the untimely deaths of people we love the most or grew up with, etc. before we count our blessings and thank our creator for sparing our lives, and it shouldn't be that way. Everyday is a gift from the man upstairs! That saying "life's too short" really needs to be followed, because you never know when YOUR day will come. And this isn't to scare you guys. I'm just being REAL! When's the LAST time you told your parents you loved them? Did something nice for someone just because? The last time you genuinely sat down and thanked God for everything in your life...both good and bad? If you cannot answer these questions, then it's time to change that. I think about  all who are currently suffering over there in Japan and my heart crumbles, because a lot of them don't have the opportunity to change that....and suddenly....my personal problems are not even important anymore.

So do something different today. Start living your life as if you weren't going to be here tomorrow. Tell the people around you how much you love and appreciate them. Don't hold on to grudges and create bad air between you and someone else. You recently had a falling out with a friend, be the bigger person and work it out. Just broke up with your significant other and giving them the cold shoulder but still very much love them, get back together with them. Just do it all people! This life is a crazy thing, but it isn't worth living if you don't appreciate those and share your life with those who are around you and love the most. If our day was to come tomorrow, what would be your last memories? Think about it.....

What inspired this title of this post was this song. This was recorded by an All Star Cast of artists, sampling from Marvin Gaye's "What's Going On". This was released shortly after the September 11th tragedies. Listen to the words of this song. 

God Bless the WORLD! And a big SHOUT OUT to the men and woman that are in the Arms Forces, Navy, Army, Marines, etc. that are going over there to help Japan during their time of need. 

Now Boarding the Lover's Express--Blog Launch!

Hello ladies and gents! I have to say that I am a bit excited about this new project that I am taking on. This is my first and EVER blog that I have ever created all by myself. (Go me, go me! *as I do the cabbage patch*). Various events that have transpired within these last few days that have inspired to make a blog. I have friends who have blogs and I'd have to say the one that has inspired me the most is my dear wifey. (I love you Ari...*big hugs*) Now before you all get your panties/boxers all in a bunch about my sexuality, "wifey" is one of my best friends that I have had the pleasure of knowing for 5 years. She's the one that told me to embrace my randomness and go for it. So once again, shout out to the wife! Also, I wanted to give a shout out to the other individual that has played a major part in the launch of my blog. He know who he is, and also gave me the idea for the name of this blog, and I GENUINELY have to thank him for all the experiences that I went through with him--good and bad. To the man that will probably have my heart for a while. Bittersweet I must say, but you have allowed me to take this opportunity to focus on myself. To grow, experience, learn, and embrace this point of my life. So I thank you once again, for everything. 143!

Alright, enough of the sentimental stuff (I'm SUCH a sap, it's quite disgusting, but you will see that side of me VERY often lol). As I have stated again and again, I am the most RANDOM person when it comes to thoughts. So I took it upon myself to create a journey of thoughts that you guys can follow along with me. My thoughts mainly consists of love, food, music, fashion, the future but definitely not limited to ANYTHING. So you will see a myriad of postings on this blog. So I warn you ahead of time for the drastic posting from one subject to the next. When the wheels start turning in my head, my mind GOES! My personality will definitely shine through this too, so you guys will get a sense of who Mel B is. I must say that I am a very private person and won't be relieving the NITTY GRITTY aspects of my life, but I am very open to share my thoughts, my loves, my dislikes, etc.

And please feel free to leave comments on any of my post. I'm an open-minded individual that embraces positive and negative feedback. Or just plain ole comments. I apologize in advance if I offend anyone with my posts. This is an honest space and honesty is what I will be projecting at all times--HATE IT or LOVE IT!

Anywhoooo, sit back, relax, and enjoy this ride on the Lover's Express.

Welcome

-Mel B.