Lessons of The Week 01.11.2012

So, I am going to attempt to add a new component to my blog called "Lessons of The Week". I just thought of it like 2 mins ago. Lol. But seriously, I learn a lot everyday, and I figured I'd document the lessons that I have learned every week. Now, I can't guarantee it will be a WEEKLY thing because I am a busy woman, BUT I shall try my hardest.

So...here goes....

1.) Being Stubborn Gets You Know Where. 

I've learned this for quite some time now, but it's been more predominant throughout these past couple of weeks.  I can be honest and say that I can be and have been hard headed in the past. It's the least of my worries out of the flaws that I do have, but it's something that I continual try to learn from. You have to learn how to pick and choose your battles. There isn't anything wrong with standing your ground and being stuck in your ways, but you have to learn how to compromise. And if your THAT stubborn that you can't even do that...agree to disagree and keep it moving.

2.) Growth and Maturity Takes You a Long Way


I actually had a conversation today with someone that I use to be really good friends with years ago. And it felt good being able to talk to them. I'v had my reservations about them at first when they first initially contacted me, because I still had the mindset that they were the same person I knew years ago. I had to realize that people do change. And although I do not have to be buddy/buddy with them, I can carry on a conversation, have some laughs, but just be cautious.When I think back on it now, we stopped talking for some stupid reasons. Mainly because I think they were following a lead of another person. It's just nice to see how someone has grown and matured. Including myself in the situation. There was a moment in time where I really could have cared less whether I talked to individuals that I've cut out of my life every again. Although there are still some people that I still do feel that way about, I have gotten to the point where I can forgive, but not necessarily forget, and keep it moving.

3.) Everyone Has Their Own Breaking Point...


I found myself making a hard emotional decision last week, but it had to be done. The type of personality that I have is that I am a forgiving person (maybe too forgiving at times apparently). I have a big heart, and I will do ANYTHING for the people that I love. I'm a fighter. A fighter of friendship....a fighter for family....a fighter of love. But sometimes, you get to a point where you are tired of fighting based on how that person is treating you. I got tired of a certain individual making me feel like I was the scum of the Earth. (sounds a bit dramatic right? Trust me...this phrase suits them EXACTLY). Just making me feel like I was this horrible person. And I'm far from that. It got disappointing when I thought of  all the things that I put up with and tolerated, and now as soon as I act human, and maybe even crossed the line a little, it's the point of no return. And it's really unfair in my opinion. With this specific situation, you CANNOT make someone see something when they are hell bent on what they choose to focus on. It's literally like fighting/talking to a brick wall--you will get NO WHERE and all that energy has now been wasted. It's really sad and unfortunate. I even caught myself this morning waking up in disbelief, like "You REALLY can't be serious about this...SERIOUSLY". Lol. And I felt crazy at first because this is EXACTLY what I was saying to myself out loud. And I'm still in disbelief, but I honestly can't have someone in my life that will sit there and judge me and not FOCUS on WHO I AM and WHAT I'VE DONE even past the situation. I just don't get that...but I digress. Don't get me wrong, this person isn't the devil or anything. Lol. I don't hate them, and I still love them. They were pretty awesome to me. I say that they WERE instead of IS because it feels like I don't even know who they are anymore. I will miss that person's presence in my life, the friendship, and the person who I thought they were, but they have showed me that the things that I have done and tolerated from them was all in vain, and it honestly makes me feel stupid and dumb for even putting up with all that I did. But hey...you live and you learn right?

4.) No Matter How Alone I May Feel...I'm Never Alone.

Over the past week I've had some great conversations with a few of my close female friends. It's just empowering to me to see/hear about their struggle, their growth and strength. It's just confirmation that I'm not alone in this thing we call life, and like me, they go through or HAVE gone through the same things that I have. It's one thing when adults like your own mother, aunt, or grandmother try to give you life advice about things based on their experiences...which isn't a problem at all because they have been there done that and who better to get advice from someone who has years of experience hurt, pain, happiness,etc. It just means more to me when I hear the same exact things from my friends, because I know that I am not the only person going through it. I know I'm always saying this to you all ( my friends that is), but never forget how much I truly appreciate you all!!!!! I can't say that enough! :-)

Well, there you have it. Some thing that I have learned from the weeks leading up to today. I hope you can take something out of this. Even if you can't, I still appreciate you guys taking the time out to read.

The Realest Post I Ever Wrote-Happy 2012

This post is brought to you by this beautiful view of the Pacific Ocean that I am currently admiring from my hotel room window. :-) I havent been the best blogger in the year 2011 (with very good excuses might I add), but in 2012 I will definitely try my hardest to at least blog once a week. Keyword...TRY!!!!!! Moving on though, my aunt keeps telling me that this is my year when it comes to academics, professional, etc. While I do believe her, I just wanted to step back, think, and express myself a little. 2011 has been a crazy year. Definitely one of my hardest working years and I have to say that I am extremely proud of myself. Although I've had a great year as far as determination and ambition, I haven't been the best person that I could be. Like you all, I am a work in progress. I'm not perfect. No one is. This may be a bold thing to say, but I'm starting to think that people would like to focus on all your negatives then focus on your positives. And that's sad. In a world of imperfections, I do not think that people have a right to judge you based on the things that you do, when they should look in the mirror themselves.

I'm starting to realize that not everyone is for you. Although they say that they will always be in your corner, love you, etc., with some, thats far from the truth. That they would rather see you suffer in a time of need, then put differences aside to help you. I have to say that THAT's the most selfish thing you can do. Things happen, whether it was provoked, accidentally, etc. And ppl make mistakes. But why must they be constantly reminded by the wrong that they have done and be treated so cold? I've done some effed up things in 2011. Really just 1 thing...but I don't deserve to be treated inhumanely no matter what. Well, there are some acceptable actions that can result to one being treated like sh*t, but I digress.... Point is, everyone who truly knows me would agree.


Spending my 1st of the New Year physically sick and emotionally drained was a turning point for me. No one likes to be sick on vacay. That's the worst thing ever. And one wants to feel alone. I was able to sit back and reflect on ALL 365 days of 2011. Every positive and every negative. At the end of the day, all I can say that 2011 was the year of strength ( testing of strength). They were and still are alot of lessons to be learned even past 2011, but I have definetely learned alot. Being able to get away and be miles away from home really can clear your head, and although my head isn't completely clear ( because I'm still congested lol), I had my time to think and reflect on life. I want go leave 2011 behind and focus on what's ahead.

To my close friends, I thank you for all that you do and continue to do for me. Whether we speak everyday or every few weeks, I thank you for always being there in some shape or form. To my family, no words needed. My actions speak so much louder then what words can describe. To those individuals that I have hurt of offended along the way in 2011, I do apologize for crossing lines and for my short comings.

I look forward to all that 2012 has to offer. The new people that enter my life, the strengthen of friendships and relationships, the new adventures, and just enjoying life period. Those who chose not to accompany me on my journey, that's your decision and I wish you nothing but the best in all that you do. I believe that everything happens for a reason. What that reason is, I have no idea. But I do know that everything in life is a lesson.

I know that I am going places in life. I may stumble on the way, but at the end of the day, God has my back and is looking out for me. I hold no negative feelings towards ANYONE as I embark in this new year and new journey. All I can do is look forward. I said all that I could say and had to say. If people still want to be consumed in what I have done or havent done, then......?????

A special birthday shout out to two amazing women....my friend Leslie and Arika!!!!!!! I hope you guys enjoy your big days and ask that God continues to bless you both!!!!! Xoxoxox

Another SHOUTOUT to my bestie who got engaged on NYE and I was there to witness it. Love is a beautiful thing and to be apart of something as precious as an engagement brought tears to my eyes. I'm sooo proud of you and I see great things happening for the both of you. Congrats!!!

To the person trying to sell or break the code to get into my lost phone....good luck!!! Mad I lost all 300 and something of my pictures but there's no point in crying over spilled milk. New phone is on it's waaaayyyyy :-)

To my future....I'm ready for ya *Drake voice* :-)

Last day of vacay...going out with a bang.....

HAPPY 2012!!!!!!!

-Mel