House Of Balloons--xo

When I say this is REALLY for the musical open minded...I'm NOT even playing. If you haven't figured it out by now..I am a BIG music head. I love all types of music. I love originality, lyrics, musicality, THE WHOLE 9!!! It felt so good to stumble upon this group. (shout out to that person's tweet). The Weeknd-xo is NOT your typical R&B group and I love it! I don't know much about them but that they are from Canada (Toronto if I'm not mistaken) and Drake (also a native Torontonian--that's SO not a word, but WHATEVER lol.) supports them to the fullest. Actually, Drake promoted them on his blog. (I can't remember which one though.) When I say this group is AMAZING...it's an UNDERSTATEMENT. Just something about the songs,the lyrics, the hidden meanings, the production,...uhhhh...I can't explain it. The best way I could describe how this group's music makes me feel would be....hmmm...*thinking*....me being on drugs. And I DO NOT mean that in a bad way! (Disclaimer: I do not SUPPORT drugs in any way, shape, or form--drug free is the WAY to be!) You almost have to have that "on another planet" mentality to appreciate their music and they take me there! I felt like this mixtape was something that I needed to hear, and I wanted to share with you guys. Let me forwarn you, this mixtape isn't for everybody and not everyone will appreciate it. For those who can, and love listening to music as much as I do, then you're in for a treat. The song that I'm currently blasting is "The Knowing". I wish I knew the exact lyrics to certain parts of the song, but I feel like it's SPEAKING to me right now. My other favs are "Wicked Games", "Coming Down" "What You Need", "Loft Music", hell..the WHOLE mixtape! I have a feeling that this group is going to BLOW UP. The whole world needs to listen to the story that they have to tell. Download their mixtape here. Follow them on Twitter @theweekndxo and like them on Facebook. Enjoy!

Love Vs. Lust

I'd have to say that this has been a topic that has been on my mind lately. I am an analytical person and will break things down to a TEE trying to understand it as a whole. And although I feel like I know the difference between LOVE and LUST, a lot of individuals my age do not and/or allow LUST to get in the way of LOVE.

It's as simple as this for me...LUST: yearning, desiring, and wanting to be with a person sexually without any emotional attachment. In simple terms--it's JUST sex! Now, is it normal for any man or women of all ages to lust after certain individuals they may know, fantasy about, or randoms...umm...I guess so. Well, I take that back..I KNOW so. Is it normal you ask? Yes...it is. There's nothing wrong with lusting, but here is where the bomb is DROPPED. People tend to confuse LUST and LOVE, and honestly, I think by a certain age, you should be able to distinguish the two.

LOVE to me...well..I'm not sure I can fully explain what love is. Because it's more of a feeling and even an action. When you LOVE your partner, it's like a breath of fresh air. Love feels like freedom. Love makes you feel INVINCIBLE. A natural high! You can feel it, smell it, taste it, hear it, and when it's real and genuine...you can definitely SEE IT.  A place where you and your lover can escape to. Love is overwhelming in a good way. Just talking about love will make you cry...THAT'S WHAT LOVE IS! Everybody's definition of love is different than mine, and that's okay. I always believed then when you truly love someone, all you see is them, until a wise woman--my mother--told me that it was normal for guys of all ages to have fantasies about being with other women, and the same thing goes for women. I was shocked to hear such a thing, but mothers know best because they have been there...DONE IT ALL! Lol

The thing that I don't seem to understand, is why do men (and women in some cases) allow LUST to get in the way of LOVE? Why do men allow the LUST for other women get in the way of how they feel about you? Why do they allow LUST to CONFUSE the LOVE that they feel and have for you? You LUST and now questioning whether you LOVE me or not? (not me persay...a general statement..so lets clear that up QUICKLY lol.) Why does LUST have to change EVERYTHING, when all it is is just that...LUST??? Soo many unanswered questions, and I will probably never figure out the true answer to it. But for me personally, I find it quite unfortunate that men allow lust to get in the way of how they truly feel about the person they have invested YEARS in. I can understand that men and women do like to explore life. In this case...sleep around and experience different people. I'm not saying it's right or wrong, because it's simply whatever you chose to do. I will never judge a person for sleeping around or only having one sexual partner. But...what I WILL JUDGE is you leaving your 80 for a 20! (Ever heard of the 80/20 rule? If not...LOOK IT UP, or watch "Why Did I Get Married" :-) )

I think it's soo CRUSHING when a guy leaves the woman he loves all because of lust, and sits there and has the audacity to question whether he really loved you in the first place because of LUST. And although it's normal, it's better to get that stuff out your system before you attempt to be in a committed relationship. But don't be so ASS BACKWARDS about it! Don't invest so much TIME, ENERGY, BLOOD ,SWEAT, TEARS, TOLERANCE, PATIENCE, etc. nurturing a relationship which progress is seen, to THEN decide that you want to test the waters.

Now, although I took it THERE with you guys, there is happier side of love and lust.

Lust and love CAN be as a whole. Because when you really love someone, you also lust for them. You can lust to be with your man/woman. You can yearn for their touch, their kiss, their hugs, etc. And in that particular situation, love and lust is a beautiful thing. I think it's a great feeling to be so connected to your partner not only sexually, but physically, mentally, spiritually, and emotionally. That's what I call LOVE!

I'm going to leave this topic open for discussion. I've gave you my opinions, so PLEASE feel free to leave a comment below. Men...you are MORE then welcome to comment also. I encourage your comments!

Many Thanks! :-)

Good Evening Guys and Dolls,

I just wanted to take this time to write a blog that was geared towards my audience. Now I'm gonna keep it short and sweet, because I can ramble lol. Anywho, I appreciate all the love that has been showed to me since the making of this blog. I've been getting overwhelming feedback and it makes me feel good. It's a great feeling to know that I'm being heard! I never knew my randomness could get me recognized soo much. I'm not a professional, and a lot of the things I blog about are purely opinions. The fact that you all appreciate the things I have to say puts a smile on my face! :-)  From the BOTTOM OF MY BIG HEART, I thank each and everyone of you guys! I will continue to be my RANDOM self! I promise you that's not changing EVER!

THANK YOU ALL AGAIN!!!

xoxo

~Mel B~

"A Beautiful Storm"

I never did like when it stormed.....was always concerned about the power going out...being struck by lightening, and the thunder scares me...

But my fear never prepared me for what I was about to experience.....

Cool autumn night as I sat by the window...
Waiting for the rain to fall...
Thought I'd try something and experience the rain from another view...
Outside....

Fear and hesitation was SCREAMING at me as I opened the door,
But that didn't stop me...
Stepped outside and it proceeded to rain harder.
Heard the rumbling of the clouds
Instincts told me to turn back around and go back into the house...but I stayed..
Curiosity intrigued me...

Lightening struck once, followed by thunder, as the electric wave hit my body cavity.
What I always imagined being painful, felt....felt...
Overwhelming...new...BRAND new.
I looked up to the sky as the rain hit my forehead..
Embracing each drop that rolled down my face...
The drops proceeded to roll down to my lips...
Stuck my tongue out my mouth to taste and it was everything I thought it would be...
Sweet....

Feeling the rain against my skin gave me so much comfort,
Made me feel safe, and erased all of my fears.
Never thought about riskin' my life out of curosity...
As the rain continued to fall, clouds rumbling, and lightening illuminating the sky,
I stood there and soaked it all in...thinkin that there was no where else I'd rather be at...
..such a beautiful storm...

Out of nowhere, the storm got really bad and you could tell that it had a mind of its own.
It seemed to be getting worse, and lost all control.
A tornado formed in the process and off it went...
Destroying the foundation that it built.
Roots were pulled out the soil...
Houses crumbled...
Debris covered the ground below my feet.
And there I was...heartbroken..as the world around me shattered.

It felt good to get a relief from such a natural disaster.
The sun was shining...the birds chirping...
But all I could think about was what I just experienced.
I longed for the storm, hoping it would be predicted in the weather forecast...
...but it wasn't....

Fantasies turned into day dreams, day dreams turned into nightly dreams.
Just to wake up each morning to see that the sun was shining yet another day...
Bittersweet...
"Sunny Days and Cool Nights" the weatherman said with so much excitement, for the upcoming week's system.
But something felt different....I could feel it in my bones...

And just like that...around midnight Saturday...the sign of clouds started to appear.
My eyes lite up...
I knew a storm was brewing in the midst.
For a week it drizzled until I finally heard the clouds start to rumble...
Then...it happened...I was struck by lightening for the second time...
As the electric surge overtakes my body, memories of the past takes over my mind...
Damn...this feels better then the first time...

I was a bit hesitant at first...
Residuals from the last disaster traumatized me...but I risked my life a second time...
I knew such a feeling...an ELECTRIC feeling...comes around rarely.
So I embraced the rain again...
Felt soo good to experience such a familiar touch.
Replanting the seeds in the saturated soil was not easy...
One seed at a time I told myself...

...BLOSSOMED...

Fully recovered...as long as the storm stuck around..I was happy
Rain fell everyday for the past six months..
Progress..INCREDIBLE...

...NATURAL HIGH...

That all changed...

I fell asleep one night, woke up to clear skies.
The storm must have passed the night before, but this time, it didn't leave such a destructive path...

Confused...baffled...hurt...sadden...
Will it ever return?...

They say lightening doesn't strike the same place twice...but it did...
Will it strike a third time?
I'm left watching The Weather Channel...
Hoping that rain is in the weeks forecast..
They never could get it right...

As I sit here, watching the rain fall from my window..
I'm forever reminded by the first time I experienced...
Something so life changing...
A disaster it was, but I will never forget such a beautiful storm....

What's Going On?

Man, where do I even begin? I was really suppose to post this yesterday but I got a little tangled up. I'm a day late but my thoughts about this situation doesn't change. I'm sure you've heard about the DEVASTATING events that have taken place on Friday in Japan. (And if you haven't, have you been hiding under a rock for a day? Like..REALLY. Be up on your current events!) Anywho, first and foremost, I want to send out my condolences to anyone who is affected by the earthquake and tsunami in Japan, Hawaii, and the West Coast. Apart from this situation, I know you guys are ALSO familiar with what's going on in Libya (once again, if you DON'T know, please do some research!)  My heart is really heavy about all of these natural disasters and wars, because I honestly feel like God is trying to speak to us. Well, more like SCREAMING because he's been speaking to us for QUITE some time now. Now, I'm not trying to preach, or even get all religious on here, but seriously, what is going on in our world? When I think about all these earthquakes that have happened within the past year, the flooding and tornadoes that are hitting the states, and the violence going on overseas, it REALLY makes me sad and wonder if our days are numbered here on Earth.

What makes me even more sad that it takes something bad happening for us all to get a reality check. It's takes natural disasters, close calls, the untimely deaths of people we love the most or grew up with, etc. before we count our blessings and thank our creator for sparing our lives, and it shouldn't be that way. Everyday is a gift from the man upstairs! That saying "life's too short" really needs to be followed, because you never know when YOUR day will come. And this isn't to scare you guys. I'm just being REAL! When's the LAST time you told your parents you loved them? Did something nice for someone just because? The last time you genuinely sat down and thanked God for everything in your life...both good and bad? If you cannot answer these questions, then it's time to change that. I think about  all who are currently suffering over there in Japan and my heart crumbles, because a lot of them don't have the opportunity to change that....and suddenly....my personal problems are not even important anymore.

So do something different today. Start living your life as if you weren't going to be here tomorrow. Tell the people around you how much you love and appreciate them. Don't hold on to grudges and create bad air between you and someone else. You recently had a falling out with a friend, be the bigger person and work it out. Just broke up with your significant other and giving them the cold shoulder but still very much love them, get back together with them. Just do it all people! This life is a crazy thing, but it isn't worth living if you don't appreciate those and share your life with those who are around you and love the most. If our day was to come tomorrow, what would be your last memories? Think about it.....

What inspired this title of this post was this song. This was recorded by an All Star Cast of artists, sampling from Marvin Gaye's "What's Going On". This was released shortly after the September 11th tragedies. Listen to the words of this song. 

God Bless the WORLD! And a big SHOUT OUT to the men and woman that are in the Arms Forces, Navy, Army, Marines, etc. that are going over there to help Japan during their time of need. 

When It Rains, It Pours....

Soo, I think it's safe to say that I've been knocked back into orbit. Hahahaha! I'm just kidding. But I no longer feel like I'm on that natural high that I was on just THIS past Sunday! I don't know where you guys are located this morning/afternoon, but if you're surrounded by rain, then maybe you can relate. This is the type of weather that just makes you want to lay up in the bed, watch movies, eat a whole bunch of junk food, and take periodic cat naps...all sharing it with the person you want to the most. *sighs* But that's only in a dream world...well...maybe if you catch the rain on the weekends. It is said that weather can dictate your mood. If you're seeing nothing but sunshine and the temp is nice and comfy, you're usually happy. When it snows, you're usually frustrated. When it TOO hot and muggy, you're irritated. And when you're too cold...well...I haven't figured this one out yet. I guess you're primarily focused on getting warm, so, maybe...hmmm..DETERMINED. (yeah that's it...lol.)

Now I don't know if it's the rain and/or the dream that I woke up to after my little nap before work, but I'm currently just in a mood, and I can't quite put my finger on it. And I don't want to sit there and analyze it because that's only going to make it worse. I'd rather just go about my day as normal and hopefully by the end of the day, this indescribable mood will be out the door! I can't say that I don't know EXACTLY why I feel this way because I do have a strong gut instinct on what it could be...I just don't know why. *Melly shrugs* One moment, I'm ready to take advantage of the opportunity that's been given me, the next, I just don't know and I want to live my life as I was living it two weeks ago. I feel like I have a lot of thoughts and there's a lot of unanswered questions that I would like to know the answer to. I feel like taking a drive to somewhere. About 45 mins away from me. ( Hahahaha...you won't get it. *Insider*) Well, whatever the case may be, I'm hoping by the time my work day ends that I am in a better mood. Patience and tolerance is something that I continually have to work on EVERY DAY, and this feeling and mood is no different.

So if you're being rained on just like me and in your own mood, then I'm thankful not to be the only one. Just keep going about your day, and hopefully the storm will pass in a day or two. In my case, sunny skies won't be seen until Saturday. WOMP WOMP!!! *thumbs down*

Enjoy your Thursday GUYS and DOLLS!!! :-)

Triple Feature

If you haven't noticed by now, my brain is like my own personal jukebox--its a gift and a curse. Lol. Anywho, woke up with these 3 songs in my head. No pun intended  with the meaning or content with the words, I just like theses songs. So bear with me as I have a random music moment. No description is really needed. Just click and enjoy! :-)

This song takes me back to Summer 09'. It makes me smile and can't help to smile about it now--Bittersweet.

Do You?

Self Explanatory. 

'Cuz I'm Tryna Be Unforgettable

I hope you all had a great Monday and enjoying your evening. I'm POOPED but it didn't stop me from blogging. Primarily because the person I want to share my events of the day with is currently unavailable and is not within my reach at the moment. *sighs*  So, what can you do...*Melly Shrug*

These next two songs that I am about to post I have been BLASTING in the car any chance I got today. Felt great to cruise to these songs after work, while overlooking the skyline of the BIG CITY from afar...reminded me of....*sighs*

Anywho...on to the post :-)

I've been bumping this song ALL day. Back to Back to BACK!!!! I really was just in a Drake mood today. In fact, this was the other song that I woke up to this morning (in my head of course). This song titled "Unforgettable" feat Young Jeezy, is featured on Drake's first official album, Thank Me Later released back in June 2010. Thank Me Later features a lot of his frequently played hits including "Find Your Love", "Over", "Miss Me", and "Fancy". I honestly think that there isn't a SINGLE SOUL on this planet that does NOT know who Drizzy Drake is. (In our generation I'm referring to. Feel free to Google him if you don't.)

Now, getting back to this song, I love it! Seems like I love a lot of songs but hey....you can't blame me...I'm a music head and not ashamed about it--I love GOOD music--PERIOD!!! "Unforgettable" to me has a double meaning. If you listen to the lyrics of this song, I think you could figure it out. The greatest thing about music is that you can analyze it your own way. There are no right or wrong answers. Moving on though, the double meaning that I get out of this song is 1.) Someone who is rising to the top and trying to stay on top and does not want anyone to forget who they are...the name they made for themselves...and just in general, how hot they are. Sounds cocky doesn't it....but there's nothing wrong with trying to be unforgettable in that light. In Drake's case, I think he doesn't want ANYONE to forget how talented he is. Who can blame him! Now on to 2.) A break up that has occurred and this person (male or female) does not want to be forgotten--which is also normal. When a relationship ends...whether it ends on good or bad terms...I think it's normal to not want to be forgotten. In a situation where the relationship was GREAT and this person was indeed the "Best You Ever Had" (like how I slid that in there...hehehe...I know, I know, I'm soo corny..lol) then of COURSE you don't want to be forgotten. 

As I stated above, how ever you decide to interpret this song is up to you. If you're not familiar with this tune, then take a listen. You talk wanting to hear quality music....then.....here it is. 

NOOOOOOWWWW...on this the next song!!!

 

I'm not even going to get into a long detailed or even a short description of this song with this artist. Anyone who knows me knows I LOVE ME SOME TRIGGA TREY! Like, it's NOT A GAME. His looks have something to do with it, but I really like his songs--even if MOST OF his songs are sex related. Let's be serious now people....SEX SELLS! Anywho, "Unfortunate" which is on this 3rd album titled  Passion, Pain, and Pleasure, has to be one of my MOST FAV Trey songs. I'm not even going to analyze the lyrics of this song. Just take a listen! And I promise, ANYONE can relate to these lyrics. And if you can't, then that means you have NEVER had a serious break up in your life. 

Hope you guys can open your minds and let some new music into your life. Both of these songs never seem to disappoint...at least to me they don't. Relate-able an an easy listen...what's not to like about them!

Hope your ears enjoy what they are about to hear ( or have already heard ;-) )

Happy MONDAY! :-)

I've become such a blog addict I tell you. But since I woke up on the right side of the bed, and with a certain person on my mind this AM, I wanted to share this music moment with you. Now, there were two songs that I woke up to in my head, and I figured i'd just post this one first. If you guys haven't guessed by now, I'm a HUGE Chris Brown fan! This young man has soo much talent. Anywho, this song is from his CD "Graffiti" that was released back in December 2009 that include "I Can Transform Ya" and "Crawl". It's called "I'll Go". I'm such a sucker for sappy love songs and this one is NO different. I'm not going to sit here and analyze the song. The lyrics are real self-explanatory. But, I wanted to dedicate this song to someone--to LOVE. To finding it, to keeping it, to never losing it, and if it so happens to stray away, to finding it's way back.

TO LOVE! *Cheers*

Everyone have a productive and BLESSED Monday!

Having a "Me" Moment...Imma Do it All!

I'm taking this time to say how much this weekend has been productive for me. I never thought that I could find so much therapy and refuge in blogging, and I am SOO glad that I created this blog. I've been through soo much within these past 5 months, but it's all too normal--nothing that is new to life. From disappointments, rejection, tears, laughter, disagreements, a loss of a close friend (non-death related), to sooo much more. Life wouldn't be worth living if everything stayed constant. The only thing consistent in life is CHANGE and I think we all should embrace it. I feel like I'm finally coming into my own--discovering me. And I have to say...it feels GREAT. I'm embarking on new ventures, I'm helping those who can not help themselves, and everyday I get closer and closer to my dreams and it feels SOO GOOD! I really hope that this moment is not short lived, because I'm currently on a natural high and do not want to be smacked into orbit ANYTIME soon! Lol. So as I sit here, drinking my glass of vino (Chardonnay to be exact) on this cold rainy winter night, I can't help but to give myself a pat on the back. *proceeds to pat self on back* I love my blog, and I will continue to nurture it and watch it grow. I'm hoping that I can keep up with this for as long as I can, whenever I can. Even if no one is reading, I will continue to write and share my thoughts because I know somewhere in this world, SOMEBODY WILL READ. Lol. *Cheers*

This song only seemed fitting for my me moment. Words can NOT express how much I love this song! "Do It All" by Drake has to be ONE OF MY FAVORITE DRAKE SONGS EVER! It's just something about it. It definitely makes me feel good. This beat is CRAZY. Try blasting it with the volume turned up--the bass is something SERIOUS. I was actually having a convo with one of my good friends about this song (who is a BIG Drake fan), and I was happy that we both share the similar feelings when it comes to this record. Now, if I can go out to a bar or lounge and the DJ plays THIS song, I promise you, I will FOREVER support that DJ. Lol. Take a listen! You can't tell me that this song doesn't make you feel the same way. *runs off and proceeds to dance with wine in hand*

I hope everyone enjoyed their Sunday night and had a safe, productive and/or relaxing weekend. I wish you all a positive and productive week ahead. Peace and many blessings.

xoxo -Mel B.

A Feel Good Tune

This song makes me feel good. Like one of those "good clean fun" tracks. If you really listen to the words, I'd rate it PG-13 but it's not that bad lol. Joe Thomas has been in the R&B game for a minute. He came out with hits such as "I Wanna Know", "This Things Your Man Won't Do", and "More and More" just to name a few.  This particular song is called "Why Just Be Friends" that was released on his latest album in September 2008.I personal love and wouldn't mind him making another comeback. But in this day and age, you gotta start competing with the people who are tearing up the charts at the moment. It's either you put out a good hit, or you keep it moving. Feel like R&B game is missing quality music in a sense, but there are still other newly release R&B albums that I haven't listened to yet. In the mean time, enjoy this feel good tune. Just makes me want to have a pool party somewhere--just like in the video! :-)

Let Me Introduce You to ArtisReeves

Before I even get into this piece, I would like to take the time to introduce you guys to one of my fav artistic creative beings. His various talents include singing, rapping, songwriting, drawing, and poetry, and I believe one day is thinking about writing a book. Ladies and Gentlemen, I like to introduce you to ArtisReeves©. Here on "The Lovers Express" blog site, I've already mentioned that I will always support ANY one of my family members, friends, best friends, boyfriend, and ANYONE who will support me no matter what personal issues I may be going through with them. And you will see posts often supporting and promoting different individuals. I happen to know this artist very well. I am probably one of his biggest fans and no matter where this journey takes us both in life, I will ALWAYS believe in him. You will probably see his work on here frequently, but for now, I wanted to share one of my fav pieces with you.

It's hard to chose because I have so many, but this one particularly stands out to me. The way ArtisReeves' style of writing is, depends on situations, words, events, etc. that sparks the creativity. Not going to reveal TOO MUCH of  his creative secrets, but I hope you enjoy this piece as much as I do. You can also follow his blog here where you will find this piece and so much more. Enjoy!

"Complicated Too"

Everything with you 

Complicated too

One hit drug, that heroin addiction love

It travels from veins to the ventricles

Arguements makes spectacles 

of us... Colosseum when we fight....

Then the next night...holding each other tight...

realizing the Heart is much greater...

Trust the lust been long gone..

or else we wouldn't be around, still...kill switch..

With us its hit or miss...no darts..

Strong Opinions Clash like titans,

Anger Overload, Temper explosions

Emotions change like forecasts...thunderstorms to sunshines...

Tornadoes to rainbows....

dont know where the feelings leave, go 

or how they come back

feels like they restart 

or jump back on track...like those cars with the spark to 'em

hold the trigger.... cause or souls are intertwined and made to keep running...

cause if you left it'd be like extracting

cells from me...

Cause i already put peace of  mind

piece of Akeem in your system's RAM,Memory..

But if we ever do part....

know that it was real and all the energy that partaked and was instilled...

was use to make you a better me and me a better you....

times two...

cause the Journey means more...

learn from mistakes then we sore...

to clouds that never been pressed on..flown through or rained from..

.Knowing that you were my reflection,

leaves my soul at ease cause you were God's depiction of ......

last word you chose cause only you can finish my sentence before i start it...

He Says He Loves Me..But Has Urges to Sleep With Other Women? WTF!?!?!?

Hmmm, such an interesting topic to talk about and also a new one at that. The type of person that I am when I am in a relationship, I am ALWAYS and ONLY with that person--mentally, physically, and emotionally. Yes, there are attractive men in the world, and I will look from time to time, but I never forget what I have back at home. Although this is true for myself and other females out there, it is SURPRISINGLY the same for men. You may have your own views on what love is and what it SHOULD be, but upon research....sweethearts.....it is PERFECTLY normal for a guy to love you but fantasize about sleeping with other women. I'm talking about men ALL ages and walks of life. And I'll even take it a step further...it's true for women as well.

Now, you may be sitting there in your feelings about it and maybe even questioning whether your man loves you or not, has he lost his attraction for you, is it something that you didn't do,etc...well...STOP! You need to sit back, relax, and have an honest conversation about it with him. And even do research on the subject matter. Remember that although he has these urges, there's a BIG difference between THOUGHTS and ACTIONS. Now, if you have an analytical minded man for your boyfriend *personal pause lol*, then he might take these new found urges and really analyze how he feels about you. Balance what he is hormonally feeling, mentally feeling, and how he feels about you. It it quite normal for men in there early 20s to not be ready to settle down. And it's even more normal for those men who are less experienced to want to explore life and have sex with random women. We may not think it's right, but it's once again...COMPLETELY normal.

I stated earlier that there is a big difference between thoughts and actions. If you can talk it out with your man and tell him that as long as he DOES NOT act on these urges, then there will be no problems. If you guys can agree on that then let it go, and go have some mind blowing sex to make him forget about the random chicks he has the urges to smash...lol. BUT..and this is a BIG BUT...if he's really allowing these new found feelings to get in the way how he feels about you and he is even questioning if he loves you or not because of these thoughts...then maybe it just time for some space from the relationship, because more then likely if the opportunity presented itself, he will cheat on you down the line. It is a pretty effed up situation because your feelings have to be hurt in the process, but you can respect him that much more for his honesty, and the fact that he cared enough to want to end it before he possibly hurt you.  Give him the time to figure out EXACTLY how he feels about you, and in the process if he smashes a chick or two...maybe 5...and decides that honestly he never really stopped loving you, just needed time to figure himself out, then its up to you if you want to re-open that door. (Everybody's relationship history is different.)

I think as women, are feelings get hurt real easily and we start acting based on emotions rather then logic. "How can you love me, and say all these things, say you want a future with me, you want to marry me, and blah blah blah, but don't want to be with me" Yeah...boo hoo hooooo! The truth of the matter is, is that you can't be stuck on that. It doesn't mean that the memories that was shared or the things that were said were all a lie. We are all HUMAN and have HUMANLY feelings. It isn't a crime! Just take the opportunity as a time to explore who you are. He's doing his thing, so you should as well ( not condoning jumping into the beds of randoms...unless that what you personally would like to do..whatever your heart pleases lol.) And in the process of doing each other you both realize, "I want to be with you"...then...hey...rekindle that flame and move forward in a positive direction.

Well, to make a long story short, love and sex do not correlate in the minds of the male species. Love and sex ONLY intersect when it's with the person that you really genuinely care about, love, and could see yourself being with them for the rest of your life. It's easy for men to jump in the sack with a female and have no emotional attachment. (And easy for some females as well.)

Look, I'm not a relationship expert, but it's through life experiences from others and myself that I'm able to help others with specific situations. We all have different feelings, emotions, and perceptions and that is quite fine. I'm going to open it up to whomever will like to respond below, so guys and dolls, what do you think on the subject matter? Don't be shy to leave a comment!

Yes Doctor!!!

ACTOR JESSE WILLIAMS

Oh MYLANTA!!! *fans self* I don't think you guys are familiar with this handsome creation of God, but those who are tuned in to ABC every Thursday at 9PM (8PM CT), you know exactly who this is. This beautiful piece of eye candy is actor and model Jesse Williams. Mr. Williams stars in the hit doctor drama "Grey's Anatomy"...which I watch EVERY THURSDAY FAITHFULLY!!! He also stared in films such as "Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2" and "Brooklyn's Finest", and also made an appearance on the television shows "Law in Order" and "Greek". He is mainly known for this role as Dr. Avery on "Grey's Anatomy". Before Mr. Williams got into acting and modeling, this Temple Alum taught English and African American Studies at public high schools in Philly. Talk about beauty and brains! According to sources, he's engaged *sighs* Not surprised at all. Twenty-nine with that body and breathtaking eyes, who WOULDN'T snatch him up? Well...in the mean time...let's enjoy these few selected photos of him. :-)

It's Raining Men!

I have to be honest for a second. I never really use to be a BIG Rihanna fan. I mean she had a couple of hits, but really it was always on to the next one for me. BUT.....I'd have to say with this new album, Rihanna has definitely gained a fan. PERSONALLY, this IS Rihanna's best album! Hands down! "Loud", released back in Novemeber 2010, has the hits "Only Girl", "What's My Name" feat. Drizzy (Drake), and the controversial video "S&M". This song is called "Raining Men" feat. Nicki Minaj and I have to say that this is probably one of my Top 5 Fav. songs on this album. I honestly can NOT wait to go out to a lounge or bar and this song starts to play. It makes me feel as though I'm on the prowl. I'm young and beautiful and there are SOO many attractive men out there. Lets see what this rain talkin 'bout! *In my"go get em girl" voice...then...proceeds to do dance to song*

We Broke Up...I Didn't Try To Kill You! Why the Cold Shoulder?!

I have to start off this post with a long uuuuuuggggggghhhhhhh! Lol. Okay, now that I've gotten THAT out of my system, I have to say that this is something that really annoys me. Like really--GRINDS MY GEARS! Break ups happen, and in fact it's inevitable for some. Some end bad, and others end on good terms. I personally know of a few ladies that have ended their relationships on good terms, but the guy basically acted ghost after those words have been spoken ( mind you, he's the one that initiated the break up.) I'm talking about deleting your phone number, throwing stuff that reminds him of you away, deleting you from social network sites, untagging pictures on Facebook, deleting the friends that he's met through you, ignoring your calls, emails, etc. JUST THE WHOLE NINE! And I just really have to stand back and have a BIG "SMH" MOMENT at it all, because it doesn't make a LICK of sense to me.

GRANTED, I understand that people in general have to distance themselves from the person that they have recently broken up with, and that's why space is there and is needed. But to go to the extreme and commit all those unnecessary acts is...well...UNNECESSARY. Dude, we just broke up...I didn't cheat on you, didn't disrespect you, didn't physically or verbally abuse you, didn't disregard your feelings, didn't try to kill you, so why are you acting like I have the bubonic plague or something? Does that make you feel better? Does that make you forget about me? Does that make you sleep better at night? CMON SON!! Lol. Quit the dramatics!

Although it is ashame when things like this transpires, the truth of the matter is that it really isn't helpful. ESPECIALLY, if the relationship didn't end on bad terms. That might be the guys way of healing, but in truth, he's doing more damage then good in my opinion. Someone once said, "Memories only fade if you let them, but all it takes is one thing to SPARK them." And if the relationship was a GREAT relationship...who are you KIDDING? Lol. Like...you REALLY have to be honest with yourself. It takes more then deleted messages, phones numbers and such to get over a person, because honestly, you don't get over someone that you love that quickly...or even FORGET about them like that. And if you CAN...then...that means you were never in LOVE with them in the first place.

So fellas, the next time you want to have your version of a "Waiting To Exhale" moment, really stop and think about what you're doing and if it's even necessary. And ask yourself is it really worth it to go to the EXTREME when this person meant EVERYTHING to you once upon a time (assuming the relationship was great and you didn't end on bad terms) Think about it...

Letters From Within #2

Dear Optimistic Progression,

I have to say that I am VERY proud of you and how you have been handling yourself. I know your main concern was getting through this weekend without feeling sad, lonely, and like you had no one to talk to...but HEY...you have me! :-) I'm SOOOOO proud of the progress that you're making in such little time and I hope it only goes up from here. I really think the advice you received the other day really has changed your views. You are involving yourself in activities that keep you busy, and have recently started something that you are taking MUCH pride in, and I must say that I am very impressed! Whatever you do, DON'T STOP! Your mind may wander but remember what your focus is at the moment. I want to see that radiant smile of yours one day. And not that fake "everything is really not okay but I'm trying to hide how I really feel" smile. Lol. I know you're very familiar with those. But I'm not judging. Remember, I'm very observant ;-)

Keep up the good work gorgeous!
Signed,

Mel B. xoxoxo

You Gotta Get Back Up!

I woke up this morning with this song on my mind. I love love LOVE this song. Just instills positivity. "Get Back Up" feat Chris Brown. is one of the singles that is on T.I.'s "No Mercy" album, which was released back in December 2010. I love this song so much primarily because of the combo of both T.I. and Chris Brown and also the lyrics. These men have gone through a lot legally (Chris Brown with the domestic violence case against Rihanna, and T.I. with the gun charges) T.I. was sentenced to served a year and a day in jail, but was released from jail back in Dec 2010 and moved into a halfway house. He was released from that bondage in March 2010, exactly a day before to the year that he was sentenced. Unfortunately, T.I. violated his probation back in September 2010 when he was charged with having drugs, and associating with a convicted felon (Along with his wife Tameka "Tiny" Harris) and is currently serving a sentence of 11 months. Fortunately for T.I., the drug charges were dropped. He is set to be released on September 17th, 2011

So if you're feeling defeated at the moment, take a listen to this song. It's sure to be a picker upper! :-)

Keep your head up TIP!

Hmmmm. Break Me Off a Piece of That!

ACTOR MARION "POOCH" HALL

Laaaawwwwwdddd! Please help me with THIS dose of man candy! *wipes sweat from forehead* For those who don't know...but SHOULD know...this is the the infamous Derwin "Ding Dong" Davis. Not familiar with him? Then where the HELL have you been! Lol. Pooch Hall is one of the MAIN characters on BET's sitcom "The Game". Now, not going to get into the logistics of the show right now (saving that for another post) but wanting to give you ladies a treat before you bundle up under your blankies tonight. Unfortunately ladies, he's married, and GUESS TO WHO...not an African American. *sighs* BUT, like I've said earlier, love has NO COLOR. His wife is a Realtor in California. They are happily married with 3 kids. Lucky woman! *pouts* Well, if we can't have him, maybe we can have ourselves some sweet dreams about him. ;-) Enjoy the photos ladies and good night! 

A "Smh" Moment

People fail to realize that I am a VERY observant person...ever since I was little. So things that you may think I don't see, I actually do. In this case, I have been promoting my blog all day. I'm very proud of it, because like I've stated earlier, this world is something thats completely new to me and I want to share with any and EVERYBODY. So, I shared a link of my blog with a handful of my friends on facebook. (Social networks are  great tools to promote ANYTHING these days.) I happened to share the link with someone that I am currently not talking to at the moment...no bad blood between us...but someone that I still very much have love for and would support for the rest of my life as long as they were deserving of  the efforts. They "liked" the link (you know facebook has that "like" button") and I guess a few minutes later decided that they wanted to delete the link that I shared with them.

Six months ago if they did that, my feelings would have been hurt in a MAJOR way and tears may of even been shed ( I'm a sensitive person), and although I do feel some type of way about it now, I just had to step back and literally shake my head. I just think it's sad. But to be fair, there is more to the story that I do not care to share and can understand why they probably do not want any remnants of me on their page. I just personally feel that no matter what happens between someone you love, whether it be a family member, a sibling, a best friend or even a an ex boyfriend and/or girlfriend, if you love that person and there is no bad air between the two of you, then why not support them and be HAPPY that they have found HAPPINESS in something particular like a new  hobby such as blogging? I've been through SOOO much with this person and was literally my best friend.....but hey...I guess people handle space differently.

Ah well...guess you have no choice but to respect it....*Melly shrugs* I have NOTHING but love for them though....NOTHING!

One of My Guilty Pleasures--ICE CREAM!!!!!

The "Founders Favorite" is located on the very top, left hand corner

Let me tell you something about me. I am the FATTEST SLIMIEST person you will EVER meet! When I tell you I can devour food like NO OTHER--ITS A PROBLEM! Lol. Anywho, those who know me well know that I have THE BIGGEST sweet tooth! And to top it off, I'm a snacker. I gotta have my snacks man! Moving on though, I am currently indulging in one of my favorite sweets, Cold Stone's Creamery Founders Favorite Ice Cream. ( Are you drooling yet? Well, let me help you out a little.) This DELISH treat is combined with sweet vanilla ice cream, caramel and chocolate syrup, pecan nuts, and a moist brownie. Add the Cold Stone Creamery touch and BAM...you got yourself a mouth watering treat. Having a treat like this for me can really turn around a crappy day...even a crappy week. So whenever the next time you stop by at Cold Stone and liked all that I mentioned above, ask for a "Love It Founders Favorite". I promise you won't be disappointed! :-)

Can You REALLY be Friends With An Ex?

I know EVERYONE has been down this road before. You break up with your girlfriend/boyfriend, and if you're ending on good terms, the first suggestion is "Can we be friends?" Believe me, been there, done that! But I guess the question of the hour...or the current moment...is can you REALLY be friends with an ex? Well, I think the answer is simple to me. Depending on the type of relationship you guys had, and how it ended, I think that it is possible down the road. I think women, and I am guilty of it myself, feel like if we can't have you as a boyfriend, then why not as a friend? Because in essence, we don't want to lose them...ESPECIALLY if the relationship was GREAT. But sometimes, becoming friends with someone you we're with for so long can become painful, because there's a certain way you have to act as friends that is much different then the way you acted being a couple. It sucks, but it's the truth. I also feel that if you become friends with an ex where the relationship ended on good terms, you're bound to get back together, because you realize with time...and even hanging around them...that breaking up wasn't even the smart thing to do. Maybe at the TIME it was, but as time went by, you realize that you still in FACT still want them. (Also, BEEN THERE, DONE THAT!) But to sum this all up, YES, I think that it IS POSSIBLE. But I ALSO think that the best bet is to allow space and time from the break up to make that move. When and/or if that time comes, you'll either realize 1.) HEY...I can definitely get use to this new found friendship, 2.) You want to get back together, or 3.) It's TOO painful to be with them, without BEING with them. Catch my drift?

Now, there is another side of befriending an ex. Some people have exes from the past...say high school....that they are still cool with. I happen to be one of those people. Although we are no longer together,(and its been YEARS) we got to a point where we remained cool, and I've always admired that aspect of us, because we've NEVER crossed that line AGAIN.  In my most recent relationship though, rules definitely had to be in place. I can respect the friendship that I have with this person that I've known for 10+ years, but ALSO, my relationship comes first and I definitely have to respect the person that I am involved with. I never allowed the two to intersect each other. Yes, I can and will check up on you from time to time, but KNOW that my man will ALWAYS come first. So really, it's all about your maturity level and your priorities when it comes to this side of befriending an ex. KEEP IN MIND THOUGH that exes sometimes DO HAVE hidden agendas. If that line so happens to be crossed, it is up to you to DISTANCE yourself from that person. (Assuming that you are in a relationship...if you're not...well....frankly, that's different and up to you to decide what YOU want to do about that situation)

So, I ask the question again, can you REALLY be friends with an ex? Well, I've given you my thoughts and views on the subject matter. What is your opinion?

The Prince of VA.....C Breezy!!!

This song is currently on repeat at the moment. "Talk That Sh*t" is on Breezy's mixtape "In My Zone 2". He has some other bangers on there as well so check it out. Also, there is "In My Zone 1" that has the constant rotated song on all the radio stations, "No BullSh*t" (another one of my favs). Breezy definitely is reppin for the DMV (which is also my native habitat :-) ), and he can do no wrong in my eyes. Well...except the whole Rihanna situation and this new blonde hair that MIGHT be secretly growing on me. *covers eyes and runs away* lol

Something SWEET To Look At ;-)

 BRIAN J. WHITE

So, I was watching this movie on BET last weekend during the late hours of the night ( I can be quite a night owl) and this handsomeness was the main character of the movie. ("Trios 3: The Escort" is what the movie is called) If you don't know this beautiful piece of eye candy, then let me introduce you. This is actor Brian J. White. If he looks familiar, that is because he appeared in the 2006 movie "Stomp The Yard". I took it upon myself to do a bit more research on him. Upon my research, I discovered that Mr. White is quite the Renaissance man. Mr. White is not ONLY an actor, but also a dancer, football player, lacrosse player, stock broker, and youth activist. Talk about an eclectic resume! It was to my disappointment when I found out that he was married, and not to an African-American beauty. Love has no color, and I'm neither discriminating or hating on who he chose to spend the rest of his life with. He may be taken, but he sure is something nice to look at. Ladies, enjoy these photos.

                                                                                

For The Musical Open Minded

So, everybody should be familiar with Keri Hilson's sophomore album "No Boys Allowed" that was released back in December 2010. With the smash singles "Breaking Point" and "Pretty Girl Rock" right? In my opinion, I would have to say that this album is much better then her first. The type of music listener that I am when it comes to R&B albums and what dictates to me whether an album is a hit or not, is if it has a variety of songs that I can relate to, a couple of club bangers, and lyrical quality. Is it an album that I can listen to without skipping songs? Is this an album that will be frequently played on my I-pod? If the answer to those questions is YES, then to me, you got a good R&B album on deck.

Now, this particular song is called "Toy Solider" Keri is basically portraying the heartache she feels from a man that she thought she loved and loved her back. A man that she let her guard down for, trusted, and felt safe with--her EVERYTHING. A man who told her that she would never have to worry, would always love her,  would never hurt her, and protect her--basically, her own personal LOVE SOLIDER. Unfortunately, in relationships, a lot of unexpected events can take place to change that all. Whether that is one person growing apart from the other, infidelity, verbal and/or physical abuse, the list could go on. Whatever the case may be, once that moment transpires, heartbreak takes place (and believe me, it's definitely not a GREAT feeling).

Now, this isn't the official video of the song. It is actually a fan made video that is taking snippets from R&B artist, Trey Songz "Your Side of The Bed' video, and incorporating it with the words of "Toy Solider".

Keri Hilson to me is an underrated artist.  A lot of people say she can't sing, can't dance, has no swag, no personality, not pretty, etc, etc, etc. But in my opinion, I feel like she is an AMAZING artist and is in fact one of my favs. (along with Trey Songz. Hmmmm...yuummmmyyy lol). So take a listen to this song. Ladies, if you're going through a situation such as a break up, take a listen. And fellas, not understanding where she's coming from or don't understand how she's currently feeling, also take a listen.